Archive for June, 2011

Bad Equilibrium

Tuesday, June 28th, 2011

Following yesterday’s chain of thought about seeking common ground, we’ve already acknowledged that establishing mutual interests is an important factor for dating success. One problem a lot of daters experience is trying to find things in common with their date that are far too generic and consequently dull.

Bad Equilibrium

Feeling a little off balance here

What economists will call a bad equilibrium, we are choosing safe ground over risking being controversial. It is a common strategy that all will adopt and converge on but there is no positive outcome for either party involved. For example:

Jane [sharing a pizza with John]: I love ham & mushroom pizza. What are your favourite toppings?
John [converging as is convention]: I like it too, but my favourite is pepperoni.

The net result here? Yes, both daters have shared information and learned something new about each other but they have failed to connect with one another in a valuable way. Jane chose a safe converger and whilst John has probably been bored to death by this question, he also takes the safe route and provides an unchallenging/ uninteresting answer. Unless one of them decides to recover the situation John and Jane could go on all night like this, chatting about the weather, what uni they went to, [insert another boring question here].

It’s unsurprising then, that when it comes to online dating, the exact same thing can happen. Daters messaging each other similarly conventional pizza topping style questions is just as common as in date situations like John and Jane here. The problem seems to be that there are unlimited amounts of questions we can ask and as a result of this this, we tend to filter or revert to our fail safe conversations – the same ones we would probably have with a taxi driver on the way home.

How would the economists solve this? Well, it’s simple. You restrict yourself to only asking certain types of questions. Force yourself to talk about things that you are truly interested in, the more specific and niche you are the more chances you have of being more interesting to your date and in turn provoking interesting and engaging answers. Risk the controversial and tip the equilibrium the right way.

Mid week blues? Start making plans with members tonight!

Desperately Seeking Some Common Ground

Monday, June 27th, 2011

When you start dating someone that first initial attraction – the chemical kind, is of course important. What really makes things stick however, is reaching common ground. Things you both like, enjoy and think about are what tip that first attraction into something with substance. It means that your chances of longevity and dating success are much higher.

It could be a love of going out to restaurants, you might both like falling out of the same bar in Soho on a Friday night. Maybe it’s picnics in the park, mutual appreciation for Tarantino or getting excited over Great British Menu (we are not here to judge). Your dating destiny is all the more clearer if you both have lots in common. This is no mystery, the reasoning is pure and simple.

The first date is a great opportunity to establish this common ground. You might find that his choice of wine is terrible or you could be horrified at her insistence that the veggie option beats the meat. So be sure to go in armed with the right questions (don’t interrogate) to find out if this person sitting across the table chewing their food rather loudly is to be kept and cultivated or thrown onto the dating compost heap.

That said, can you go too far? Can you over-share? If you have bizarre or let’s euphemise – interesting habits, maybe keep them to yourself until you know it’s safe to unleash your inner freak i.e. upon discovering they also have the same strange penchant for….use your imagination here….

In a video intro on eHarmony, one girl went completely the other side of loopy in expressing her love of cats. I too have to admit I adore the furry felines, but this was just plain mad. Watch this display of insanity below and learn lessons here: establish what your date likes and share your interests but whatever you do, don’t do this.

A Nice Slice of Americana

Saturday, June 25th, 2011

It is acceptable to keep things cool and casual on date. Relieve the pressure of a first date by choosing a restaurant that is unassuming, has great food and is bang on the money in terms of the cool factor. Where is this magical place?  Well, we’ve located it and it involves heading East.

Pizza Express, Zizzi’s, Strada or any of the other formulaic chains might be acceptable for catch up with friends or a post work dinner, they are NOT acceptable in the realms of dating. Why? The simple reason that they’re an easy choice, offer nothing interesting and fail in providing a new experience. Take a date there and you’re the equivalent of all those things. Though there is something about sharing a pizza with a date that immediately breaks down barriers by introducing that needed touch of familiarity.

Pizza East, Shoreditch, is a modern pizzeria that has taken up residence on the ground floor of the Tea Building. After opening in 2009 to much acclaim – “the most influential restaurant opening of the year” – this restaurant is one of the many children fathered by Nick Jones who counts Soho House and Shoreditch House as part of his uber trendy family. Take a date there and you’ve already gained points for just knowing about it.

Pizza East, ShoreditchPizza East, ShoreditchPizza East, Shoreditch

The interior echoes its East London location with exposed pipes, concrete walls, and all over industrial style. Leather to add luxe and steel cafeteria style tables make this both edgy and contemporary. The staff are also part of this great restaurant’s atmosphere. Some have been pinched from L.A and their devilish good looks and charming smiles very much cement this as “the place to be”.

But let’s move on to the food. Pizzas blasted in wood ovens made on house recipe 10 inch bases with a basic selection ranging to more gourmet styles like the San Daniele, tomato, ricotta, pesto and ruby chard. The pizzas here are truly amazing. Even if you don’t want to go for the pizza option, there is a great antipasti menu from which you should probably choose the lamb meatballs and calamari. Meat and fish dishes cooked in the wood oven are perfect for a more a la carte style of dining or for starters, pick from the counter a plate of Mortadella and Prosciutto.

You won’t disappoint by choosing Pizza East as a date location. The venue, food and cool atmosphere will mean that you will tick all the right boxes here and maybe even surpass your date’s expectations. Trust us on this one.

Do you know any great date restaurants? Or have you eaten somewhere and just can’t keep quiet about it? Share it with your fellow members on our Places page.

Anyone For Tennis?

Tuesday, June 21st, 2011

Strawberries & cream, Henman Hill and not a hope in hell’s chance of the Brits winning the damn thing. Yes, it’s Wimbledon time. If it’s good enough for Duchess Kate (the chiefs at Wimbledon have her thank you note on display) then it’s good enough for all of us I suppose. Especially when there are lot’s of  reasons why Wimbledon this year is the hottest ticket in town.

Reason 1) Rafael Nadal

Rafael Nadal models for Emporio Armani
The gorgeous Spaniard graces centre court this season and is a promising bet to take home the trophy. His “Rafa-isms” are adored by sports journalists – one of the best being “I have a pain in my famous ass” – and his low key lifestyle have made him the game’s most endearing player. Following in Beckham’s footsteps, Nadal has modelled for the latest Emporio Armani campaign and his billboards can now be seen all over the world. Lucky us.

Reason 2) Ana Ivanovic

Ana Ivanovic
The young Serbian and grand slam winner has been voted the most attractive woman to grace the game of tennis. Quite rightly so, she is stunning. Firing seven coaches in five years, Ivanovic has finally met her match in Aussie Adidas coach Darren Cahill. The world no.18 is currently thrashing it out on Court 12.

Reason 3) Andy Roddick

Andy Roddick
Andy hasn’t been enjoying as much success on the court as he would normally hope for having been beaten at finals by Federer, but he manages to still look good. Though not on particularly amazing form, he has beaten latest rival Beck to join his nemesis Federer in the second round.

Reason 4) Maria Sharapova

Maria Sharapova
Former world no. 1, Russian beauty Sharapova is as usual, a hot contender. She was a Wimbledon queen in 2004, ruining defending champ, Serena Williams’ day. A face of fashion house, Cole Haan, a string of ad campaigns, not to mention a Sports Illustrated cover, Maria is one of the game’s all time favourites.

And finally, great scot! It’s reason no. 5) Andy Murray

Andy Murray
Despite not being  as blessed in the looks department as the other Wimbledon beauties, he is England’s greatest chance at a victory. A centre court star at this year’s tournament, all eyes are on him and you could say that it’s for all the right reasons.

Make plans and meet up with our gorgeous members tonight. You know where to go…

A Doctor’s Wife Doesn’t Wear Lace Shorts

Friday, June 17th, 2011
Lace Shorts The Kooples

The Original Offenders

The war between the sexes is an ongoing battle. I don’t think we’ll ever completely call a truce. But one brawl I thought had been left behind in the 90’s is the fight over style and what we wear. Apparently not.

A colleague had just treated herself to a stunning pair of on trend lace shorts. Amidst compliments and gasping ooo’s and ahhh’s from her friends, she revelled in the appreciation of her latest purchase. When she went home and showed her fiance he looked at her and after a pensive pause he said, “Doctors’ wives don’t wear lace shorts.” Full stop thank you very much.

Had he seen her wearing those lace shorts in a club before they were dating, upon spying her long perfectly toned and tanned pins, they would have been the object that would have attracted the moth to the flame. Now that my colleague and her beau are graduating to the next stage of their relationship – marriage – the supposedly provocative shorts are deemed inappropriate. What would the other doctors say…

We also have to look at the other side of the coin here. Perhaps, it’s not the short shorts that were the offending article but the fact that they were made of lace. Please correct me if I’m wrong men, but I believe this fabric, especially on the nether regions, is typically associated with underwear. The shorts are also black. Black lace. Our doctor could be forgiven here for making the association between his bride-to-be in her lace underwear that’s for his eyes only and her in her little lace shorts in public.

What this seems to mark for my colleague is a change in attitude and expectation. When you make that transition from love/girlfriend to wife/mother, you’re expected to live up to the seriousness and responsibility of that role. And you’d better dress the part! Twin-set and pearls anyone?

The weekend is here, why are you hanging about? Our members are ready to make plans tonight.

The Hero Complex

Wednesday, June 15th, 2011

Most if not all girls can confess to having a hero complex. The image of the White Knight coming to the rescue of every [pretty] damsel in distress has permeated itself through our culture since the days of the Round Table. Our modern version of the good knight has been Superman since 1938 (seriously, he is that old). But still, every time Lois Lane was in trouble, her close friend and colleague Clark Kent was her shoulder to cry on. When she was really in danger, off came the glasses and out came the red cape, those infamous speedos and there he was, ready to defeat any enemy or threat to the love of his life.

Now it seems the traditional Superman is no longer relevant so DC Comics and Action Comics are giving him a sartorial makeover. In the all new DC series he almost looks slightly alien-like in his new cosmic outfit. Action Comics are going in a totally different direction and are making him more human than ever.

The affinity to Speedos and skin-tights is gone. Wave adios to the mesmerising definition of each pectoral, ab, bicep & tricep as from now on Superman will be drawn, by up and coming artist Ralph “Rags” Morales, wearing jeans. Looking more like the guy from the Diet Coke ads, he is now transformed into a more altogether relevant and relateable superhero symbol.

What do we think? Personally I love the Diet Coke boy and the James Dean-esque sexiness of a toned man in jeans. In fact one of my all time favourites is the Levis 501 Stonewash Jeans campaign. But the appeal with Superman is all about fantasy, surely? Like the White Knight, he’s iconic in his alternative reality he exists in. Now he’s just muscles in jeans and I only have to go to the gym to see that.

It’s Wednesday! Have you made plans for the weekend? Click Tonight and see what our members are up to.

Away With Ye Olde Traditions

Saturday, June 11th, 2011

Ah the digital age 2.0. We have learnt to love it, quite literally. Not only the medium that now means we can connect with more people than ever (forget the six degrees of separation), but it’s now replacing the most traditional means of announcement – the wedding invitation.

It seems couples are doing away with picking out different paper/card textures and fonts (sigh) and are turning to website videos. Yes, video “Save the Date’s” are, according to Gawker, fast becoming the “hippest” way to invite people and announce your wedding. In a charming video, Tim and Jane eat their wedding cake in a rewind style video where the video ends with the cake reinstated before the happy couple. This homemade and creative touch to wedding invites is also a growing trend because of its cost efficiency.

Couples can set up a domain cheaply and send the link virally to their friends and family. Admittedly this is probably not the best approach if like me, you have relatives who can’t even work the Sky remote, let alone open an email. But, for young couples this is something I can definitely get on board with. Why not? We all wanted to star in our movie at some point.

Here’s some of our favourites:

press play… from tim and jane on Vimeo.

And here’s our very own Save the Date – Our 4th birthday is coming up very soon. Make sure you don’t miss out! For the gossip, go here.

We All Love A Good Bit Of Meat

Friday, June 10th, 2011

It’s an undeniable fact that there are some great restaurants in London. A few are simply amazing. We all have our favourite go to restuarants for Thai, Japanese, Italian, fusion whatever, but you really can’t do much better than a good steak. Combine that with an elite dining experience, innovative cocktail menu and luxury interior, you have something really special.

Steak @ The Hawksmoor

The perfect steak dinner

The Hawksmoor @ Seven Dials, Langley Street takes up residence at the old Watney-Combe brewery- the perfect setting for a restaurant that is centred around tradition and gastronomy. Specialising in various cuts of meat (you can give 48 hours notice for rare meats and they promise to get it for you), order your steaks by the weight and add half a lobster for a plate of rapture or be tempted by grilled bone marrow.

Make sure you get this early though as it’s a house favourite and is often sold out by 9 p.m. The side dishes cannot be overlooked and you should not miss out on the opportunity for beef dripping chips.

The drinks menu is an adventure through traditional English drinking rituals. I definitely recommend trying “The History of the Cocktail in Ten Drinks” – brownie points if you make it to the end. Punch cups are amazing and the famed Juleps that hold their origins in Opium are a perfect after dinner tipple. If you’re a true steak enthusiast, The Hawksmoor also invites you to engage their private rooms and start your own Supper Club.

I think there are some brilliant date restaurants each perfect in terms of suitability for different situations. Save The Hawksmoor for a truly special occasion and for the time when you really to need to bring out the big guns as it promises an unforgettable dining experience.

For more amazing restaurant suggestions, check out our Places page.

The New Ambassadors Of “Sexting”

Tuesday, June 7th, 2011
Reese Witherspoon MTV Movie Awards

Reese is prepared to school us all on the dangers of sexting

The importance of safe sexting, don’t underestimate it. These days you can’t be too careful. To be clear, sexting involves sending either a) a filthily worded message or b) a provocative photo. Both of these things might seem like a good idea at the time but like the proverbial diary you shouldn’t have written in your adolescence. Fear not, the ambassadors of safe sexting are here to guide us along. Cue Reese Witherspoon.

The Hollywood starlet spoke out against famous offenders at the MTV Movie awards (probably referring to infamous faux pas of Blake Lively and Kim Kadashian) and offered them sage advice:

I get it, girls, that it’s cool to be a bad girl. But it is possible to make it in Hollywood without doing a reality show. When I came up in the business, if you made a sex tape, you were embarrassed and you hid it under your bed. And if you took naked pictures of yourself on your cellphone, you hide your face, people! Hide your face!

Wow. We’ve certainly been told. But fair enough – keep the antics discreet! In NYC they would fully endorse Ms. Witherspoon’s wise words as the lawmakers have recently put forward “”Cyber Crime Youth Rescue Act”. If actioned, this will teach the younger generation all about “safe text” – the dangers of sending out naked pictures and the long lasting effects of Google image search (vitally important, obviously). More specifically, “the nearly unlimited ability of an infinite audience to utilize the Internet search for and replicate materials.”

Teaching the young about how to sustain a long term relationship without appropriating lewd images. Well, how helpful. Who needs sex ed when there is the “Cyber Crime Youth Rescue Act” to protect them. If only this had been around in Paris Hilton’s time. That said, would Paris be the same without “A Night in Paris”?

Put It In A Love Song

Saturday, June 4th, 2011

If music be the food of love….well we all know how that goes. Shakespeare was certainly on to something when he wrote about music’s ability to capture feelings and emotions. The moment you first eyes on each other, that first kiss, the moment when it all goes up in flames and you’re suddenly looking up “Witchdoctor” in the Yellow Pages to wreak havoc on your ex’s evil soul. There is something about songs whether it’s the lyrics or the melody, that can perfectly tap into exactly how you’re feeling about someone, so when words simply won’t do, why not put it in a love song.

Brian McFadden & Delta Goodrem

It worked for Brian & Delta...well for a while it did!

One of Click’s most popular, and most definitely one of my fav’s, is the function that allows you to send a song to another member. Maybe you’ve just come across their profile and think, “hmmm quite like the look of him/her”, you can send them Blondie’s “Call me” or “Boom Boom Boom” by the Vengaboys, depending on your musical taste! Maybe you want to romance them in which case “Crazy For You” by Madonna or Scouting for Girls’ “Heartbeat” are great options. Perhaps it’s “Time to Say Goodbye”?

Whether you’re sending a love song to seduce or sending one to the tune of “All the Single Ladies”, it really is one of the most fun things to do on the site. So, to finish the great bard’s famous line….”play on”.

Remember when we wrote about the advantages of meeting people whilst playing sports? (If you haven’t read it here!) Well now we are combining two of Click’s great loves: socialising and sport, cricket specifically, for an afternoon filled with frolics – live music, boys in their whites, need I say more? Come join us on Monday 13th June from 5.3o onwards. For details go here. I’ll bring the Pimms!