I’ve never really been very tech savvy and as for my abilities in the dating world, well they can vary from disastrous to stellar. With all the different channels to interact with someone, it does not get any easier. There’s Facebook, Twitter, online dating sites, email - it can be incredibly complicated to master your skills in the wake of multi-medium communication.
The days of spending half an hour on a text or scripting an answer machine message are over, the time this takes is a luxury that today’s dater can no longer afford. It seems it’s all about the fast and the furious with no time to slow down. Playing the waiting game in between answering a message is almost impossible as whilst you’re debating how to best draft a Facebook message, you’ve updated your status, written on someone’s wall etc, and then the mysterious, too busy you has been exposed! Whilst your private life is exposed on a grand public scale, so are your levels of interaction. To be coy, you have to much much cleverer about it.
After talking this over with a friend, we came to the conclusion that the many channels with which to engage with someone were more of an advantage than a disadvantage. Once mastered, these new tools at our disposal can be incredibly helpful. For example, messaging online allows you to demonstrate your more composed, articulate side – the side of you that is rarely shown if you’re a nervous babbling wreck the first couple of times you meet someone. First impressions count for everything and unless you’re fortunate enough to be perfectly smooth, charismatic, charming from the word go, you won’t get a second chance. Remember that brilliant scene from the movie Swingers where Mike (Jon Favreau) hopelessly attempts to leave a message on a girl’s answering machine?? Forget it, the days of being cut off by the machine, incoherent mumbling and all things bizarre are also long gone.
We also mused about the democratisation of information that would not be available to us through traditional mediums. Ever googled someone you just met/ started dating? You can unearth some brilliant information and at least you won’t agree to second date with an axe murderer. Additionally, Facebook can be very helpful – relationship status, photos (are they pictured with a different girl/guy in every other photo?). You get the idea. What is also amazing, is the amount of people you are exposed to at any given time. Your potential dating pool has gone from baby size to epic olympic proportions. Anyway, we thought it would be useful to strategise, advise and generally wax lyrical about the world of online interaction. So every now and again, be sure to look out for our tips & tricks for the dating game and its new rules!
If you liked this, then you’ll be all over Shopping For Boys and our new series of Online Adventures!
the early days of October we thought it would be a good idea to introduce a loose guide that would shed light upon the often dark and obscure corners wrought by the world of online
mutual friend’s feed and decided to friend request him. After exchanging pleasantries online (see our guide to online dating), they took things to the next level and picked up a phone. They would spend hours each night
I started seeing a guy and he used find the surprise element of how I would next contact him amusing. He might send me a text, but when I had got round to responding, it may have been on facebook or click or email… depending on where I was or what i was doing!!!
I’m getting bored with fb much prefer to scroll thru all the handsome men trying to get my attention on the new style dating sites. I dont object to putting in the time looking for my ideal one. Unfortunately havent found him yet but Im having great fun looking looking!
I love it too. I would like to get a few more entertaining opening messages though. “You’re Sexy” doesn’t do it for me (I know I am!!!) And I think we all probably get our fair share of copy and pastes. If anyone wants to get my attention, they need to at least TRY to be a bit different, then they stand more chance of getting a reply. (don’t people realise that cut and paste messages are so obvious? – I’m all for saving time as well but if someone doesn’t think I’m worth a personal message I don’t think they are worth a date.)
Yes, agree, facebook is great for checking on those with only have i photo!
I love internet dating! I do think maybe some guys take time saving to a whole new level though. A group of us all joined ClickTonight on the same day and within 3 hours we had all received the same message from the same guy, with the same typo in it. I wonder how many others received the same message and thought they were the only one. Cutting and pasting not cool guys, we like to feel special.